The 1 Thing That Needs to Change for My Health – 8/14, 8/15, 8/16, 8/17, 8/18, 8/19, 8/20, 8/21

To be honest, I’ve been feeling rather depressed lately. I’ve noticed it and noticed it having an affect on what I eat (if I eat.) I’ve had a lot of happiness issues since my son was born, and it got worse when my grandmother died. In fact, I’m not sure I’ve properly addressed my grandmother’s death for myself, but I don’t know what to do if I need to.

Anyway, that’s not why I’m writing this. The following is my food journal from August 14th until August 20th.



9:30   Coffee, Cream, Sugar (CCS)

10:45   CCS and Chips

12:00   CCS and 2 or 3 honey gram bunnies and 1 or 2 white cheddar bunnies (I break them up for my son and then munch on one or two in whole to get him eating sometimes.)

2:20   Pastrami, Dijon mustard, pepper jack cheese on butter bread with mayo and mustard.

3:30   CCS

5:00   Goat milk Strawberry Yogurt

6:10   CCS

7:00   CCS

7:10   Burger with Parmesan on butter bread with mayo and french fries.

11:00   Cherry and Pomegranate Crystal Lite

11:20   Beef Ramen



13:30a:   beer

1:30a:   beer

10:00:   CCS

11:30:   CCS and Popcorners Chips

1:00:   Chips and CCS

3:30:   Pastrami on Butter bread with mayo and mustard and pepper-jack cheese

6:00:   CCS

7:00:   Chips

8:00:   Ranch burgers with ranch and cookie and water

11:35:   water and beer



12:20a:   Cashews

9:40:   CCS

11:00:   CCS

1:00:   3 Slices of Pastrami

1:45:   Coffee Milk Sugar (CMS) and Pancake with butter

4:30:   Cashews

5:30:   CMS

7:00:   Popcorners chips

8:00:   Cookie

9:10:   Red beans and beef chili

10:00:   Crystal Lite



12:00a: Cashews

9:30:   CCS

11:00:   CCS

11:50: Pastrami and CCS

1:50:   Crystal Lite

2:00:   Spaghetti and Meatballs with Sauces

4:45:   CCS

5:45:   CCS and Tomato and Crouton with Cheese and Ranch Salad

7:30:   Leftover Chili

9:00:   Crystal Lite and a cookie

11:25:   Crystal Lite

11:40:   Cashews



10:00:   CCS

11:00:   CCS

12:50:   CCS 2 Hotdogs with BBQ

1:30: CCS

4:00:   Water

4:14:   Ranch Doritos

6:00:   Light amount of Crystal Light

7:10:   Pepperoni and sausage pizza

8:15:   Tomato and cheese and croutons and ranch salad

9:15:   vanilla ice cream with cinnamon and chocolate sauce

10:30:   water

11:30:   beef ramen



10:20:   CCS

12:20:   CCS

12:45:   egg and pastrami omelet with cheese

2:00:   CCS

4:00:   water

4:10:   CCS

5:45:  honey wheat English muffin with butter

6:00:   water

8:00:   crunchy Cheetos

8:30:   Water

9:15:  chicken tender and Alfredo spaghetti

9:30:   Hopes End Wine



12:30a:   Chips

2:20a:   Beer

10:30:   CCS

11:45:   CCS

3:00:   Leftover chili with cheese and garlic bread

4:25:   CCS

5:00:   CCS

7:00:   CCS

7:30:   chicken tender Alfredo

10:10:   beer

11:30:   beer


I believe I’ve found something I need to change. I need to limit my sugars overall, that includes alcohol, pasta, etc. I feel that if I bring that down I may find myself feeling better emotionally as well as physically.


I’m not going to add photos to this post, I’m feeling rather strange and kind of want to get the day going (I plan on doing my belly dance workout video to try and get back into that…or the yoga videos on YouTube that I enjoyed during pregnancy.)


Have a great day! A few more days left in this two weeks, then I will change how and what I eat!






How I Will Change My Life

Changing my life one meal at a time. How’s that for making personal differences?

This past week has been interesting, to say the least. I’ve been spending the time researching various things, from craft fair booth set ups (I’m an Etsy seller who is getting back into craft fairs and conventions,) to how to be paleo, the difference between paleo and keto, and which may be better. But I needed to do one step first:

I needed to see how I currently eat.

Ultimate Goal

So easily we forget to look at what we’re eating before we change it. We forget to evaluate ourselves before changing ourselves. My goal is to look at what I eat now and find ways to adjust it. I’m not going to look at numbers unless it’s needed. My ultimate goal isn’t to eat a certain amount of numbers, it’s to feel comfortable in my body again. I don’t want to be stuck measuring everything, but I do want to be alert to how much is going in my stomach.

While writing down whatever passed my lips, I found myself making a strange discovery: I don’t eat as much as I thought I did. I drink a lot of coffee (this I knew) and I eat a lot of Chicken (which is nothing new to me, either,) but overall, I don’t eat nearly as much as I thought I did. Some days, I eat way less than I should. Other days, I do eat quite a bit, but it’s small amounts frequently through the day.

And to top it off, what I do eat isn’t the best.

So I’ve made a decision. And it’s leaving me feeling very vulnerable, but you know what? How can I be sure I’ll be held accountable if I don’t hold myself accountable. So, dear reader, I’m going to post a picture I have never posted before…and one I expect will either get “go get ’em’s” or “you bitch’s.” I don’t care. I want to share my journey with you. I want to hear about your journey. I want to inspire others to start their journey, and maybe help them even make the first step…and I want to make sure I take the first step.

So, here goes…


There it is. Vulnerability. I’m at my heaviest ever and I don’t want to get heavier. And yes, I’m aware it’s not as much as some, and yes, I’m aware it’s not as little as others, but what’s important is me being comfortable, and I’m just not. I wear a full shirt and capris to the pool because I’m not comfortable in my body. I can’t wear most of my closet because I’m not comfortable with the way it sits on me anymore.

And my journey is going to start with this first promise:

For the next two weeks, I will be keeping track AND POSTING everything that I eat. I will mark the times and what it was. And after two weeks, I will begin to change small things here and there. I will show you what I change, why I change it, and what I change it to. And if you want to join me in this venture, comment! Let me know! Show me your blog and I’ll join you in this amazing life changing journey that I am determined to finish and win!

Will you win?

What Inspires You to Be Healthy?

Everyone has their own inspiration to be healthy.

I believe that the greatest gift you can give your family and the world is a healthy you.  Joyce Meyer

Human beings. Funny little creatures, we are. We rocket back and forth between diet fads. We think about how we want to feel good, look good, and be our ideal selves. We worry so much about what other people think we forget that sometimes it’s more about how we think about ourselves.


Or how we think about our futures.


We want to fit into those jeans, or we want to see ourselves in that super skinny crop top. I’m not innocent of these thoughts myself. I find myself with clothing I haven’t work in years thinking, “Man, I’d love to fit back into this…” or even looking at my renaissance corset and saying to myself, “God, it’d be nice to be able to put this one without it literally being a squeeze!”


Lately, though, I’ve found a different motivation. You see, just over a year ago, I gave birth to a beautiful and sweet 9lb 3oz boy who was 23 inches long. Yes, I know that’s big. And he sure did a number on my size, as well. But even more than that, he changed how I think about myself and my future. He changed how I felt about me.


The best I ever felt was while I was pregnant. The worst I ever felt was before I was pregnant. I was sick all the time and could never seem to get better. Then, when we found out I was pregnant, we started looking at other things to determine how to keep myself healthy. I was placed on disability leave for various reasons and ended up being home a lot. I switched to whole food vitamins instead of synthetic, and I ate as much from stove and oven as I could without using the microwave, or anything prepackaged.

If a man achieves victory over his body, who in the world can exercise power over him? He who rules himself rules over the whole world. Vinoba Bhave

Suddenly, I was better. Migraines went away, bloating was gone…I was even able to wear dresses while pregnant and bumping that I hadn’t been able to wear before pregnancy because that’s how much I had bloated! We figured out that it was the building I was working in, which was full of mold and making not just myself but others sick (and they won’t listen, so it’s not worth trying to fight them on it…) The entire time I was pregnant I was home, researching, studying, learning, eating healthy, doing yoga, craving steak, making mashed potatoes, and overall being me. For the first time I felt like I was supposed to feel. I felt happy and healthy.


Baby came, and that took some adjusting. Over time it was a bit easier…but I’ve started to notice something. I’m getting back into old habits. I’m drinking most of a pot of coffee a day. I’m drinking each night again, like I can’t take the day. I’m unhappy, I’m miserable, and I’m feeling downright done. Just done. Over everything.


What changed? My eating has been getting worse…which started when I started working evenings. My happiness has gone down, which started around the time my grandmother passed away. My overall feeling of me has diminished….which seems to be more around when I stopped taking the vitamins and started eating processed foods again.


A year on as a mom and I’m realizing the issues I’m facing. And while feeling done with everything, I look at my son and I say to myself, “I can’t wait to see the man you become. I can’t wait to see you achieve what you want. I can’t wait…” and then I think about my health. I’m at my highest weight I’ve ever been, save when I was pregnant (though I’m only 10 pounds off that…) I’m eating all this junk food again, and I feel miserable.

You can’t be a parent and say, “I need you to be more active and I need you to eat right,” when you’re still choosing to have poor eating habits. Bob Harper

I look at my son and I realize I need to change. For him. For myself, sure, but for him. To see him succeed. To show him the path to health on his own. To be an example. I need to change. I need to be healthy.


That’s my inspiration. What’s yours?